• me texting my mom: can you pick up some milk on the way home
  • mom:
  • mom:
  • mom:
  • mom:
  • me: she's not answering me
  • me: she must have went to check her phone and swerved into oncoming traffic
  • me: i killed her
  • me: i killed my mom
  • uuuuuuugh I can’t believe I’m up this early to run. TO RUN.

    Someone tell me i’m amazing or I might just fall asleep and die

  • Boy: Did it hurt
  • Girl: (sigh) did what hurt
  • Boy: Breaking through the earth's crust ascending from hell
  • theme by modernise